It’s so easy to get focused on the negative while trying to cope with infidelity or to heal a broken marriage. But when you only focus on the negative things, then all you will see are those negatives. That isn’t a good way to get out of this rut.
For today, maybe you can instead focus on the things – even just one thing – that you still love about him. Visualize it if you can. Don’t let yourself think about anything else. When the negative thoughts start trying to creep in again, force yourself to go back to that one good thing and think about it…really think about it…until it makes you smile.
Letting yourself feel a little piece of love and happiness again isn’t the same as ignoring the areas that need improvement or allowing him to be “bad”. It’s just giving yourself a well deserved rest from the anger and the hate.
Someone once told me is you “act as if…” you can start loving again. Maybe it’s worth a shot.